Jessica Biel Is Single, Woohoo!
March 11th, 2011Here’s a bit of news that I’ve been longing to hear to years now. Jessica Biel, arguably one of the sexiest celebrity babes on the entire planet, and uber doorknob Justin Timberlake have officially broken up… can I get a hallelujah!?!?!? Here’s the skinny:
Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel are no longer a couple.
The two decided to end their relationship recently and “there are no hard feelings,” a source tells PEOPLE exclusively. “It was completely mutual and they both decided it was time to move on.” (Source)
Well it’s about damn time! First off, Jessica Biel is just too damn hot to be with a major geek like Timberlake. Yeah, this guy is a freaking loser and a half. If he wasn’t famous and a teen pop star, not only would half decent girls not pay attention to him, but he’d be one of those nerds who would lose his virginity in his late twenties… to some overweight girl with a creepy hobby like collecting dolphin pillowcases. Second, you know what a newly single Jessica Biel means, right? Yup, an onslaught of post-relationship sexiness (i.e. sexy photoshoots, skimpy dresses at events, etc…) is on its way, just as it’s always the case when a celebrity babe has a public break-up. Woohoo!
Anyways, words just can’t describe the joy I’m feeling right now, so I would like to direct you to this video that best expresses my feelings towards this glorious break-up. Enjoy!
Photo Credit: Fame
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March 11th, 2011 at 11:09 am
Wow, you care way too much. You sound like the female equivalent of “he’d be one of those nerds who would lose his virginity in his late twenties… to some overweight girl with a creepy hobby like collecting dolphin pillowcases.”
Jessica Biel is mannish, not really feminine at all. That’s why you think she is the hottest girl around. That’s why most women think her, angelina jolie, olivia wilde etc. are hot. You are looking at them with heterosexual female eyes. They have large jaws, high cheekbones, broad shoulders, narrow waists; basically 17 year old boys.