Alright my peeps; I trust that you all had a safe and happy New Year’s Eve/Day? Good. Now on to the important stuff. The one thing that you’ve all been waiting for impatiently all year long… “Popoholic’s Top Ten Celebrity Babes of 2011!”. Ok, here’s the skinny; this list consists of the top ten celebrity babes that made me drool like a brain-dead zombie and rocked this website in 2011. This isn’t a list of the babes that you thought were the hottest in 2011, or the hottest babes of all time. Got that? Good, because I’m sick and tired of getting angry emails every year after posting the annual list. Seriously, I don’t want to read anything that resembles “Eva Mendes iz the hottest babe evr u stupid #$@!#!”.
Ok, so the only other thing you need to know before getting your socks knocked off is that clicking on the celebrity babe’s name or photo brings you to their respected archive where you can see all of their sexy photos and shenanigans from 2011. Ok, here we go!
Olivia Wilde almost didn’t make the list because of my recent discovery that the bottom half of her body isn’t as sexy/perfect as I remember it… or thought it was. But even with that serious loss of hotness points she still made the top ten, which just goes to show you how shwingtastic this babe is. I mean, look at her; her face alone is so freaking stunningly hot that it can induce drooling and spasms on a dead pigeon. And the braless cleavage action that she unleashed quite frequently this past year also helps. Nice.
As you guys painfully know, I’ve been digging Hilary Duff for years now, but it wasn’t until she got knocked up that I went completely gaga over her and that her hotness levels exploded… and that goes for her bodacious bosom as well! This girl is hands down one of the hottest pregnant babes in the history of… ummmm… pregnant babes, and she just keeps getting hotter with each new trimester of her pregnancy if you can believe it. And if you can’t… well, you can just gawk at her ever-growing bosom and understand how easily she made the top ten. Hot damn!
Rachel Bilson is my absolute favorite celebrity babe ever, but she just didn’t do enough to land at the top of the list… such as return my phone calls. And prance around West Hollywood in lingerie I bought and sent her. But she definitely deserves the number eight spot thanks to her insanely sexy bikini pictures, and the hundreds of photos that I posted of her showing off her sexy little legs, groovy curves, uber cuteness, gummybear thighs, and her insanely sexy bikini pictures that I already mentioned, but need to mention once more because they are freaking hoooooooooooooooooooot!!!!!! Sigh… an absolute vision of perfection.
Victoria Justice celebrated her eighteenth birthday in 2011… and that alone gets her on the top ten. ‘Nuff said!
Our favorite Pussycat Doll, Nicole Scherzinger, had a very good year with the success of The X Factor and all, but that’s not why she made the list. Nicole landed the number six spot because she’s drop dead sexy, and because she showed off her beyond sexy cleavage, killer stems, and bodacious booty every single chance she got in the skimpiest and most revealing clothing I’ve seen all year. And her recent appearance on Conan may have been the sexiest and most cleavage-popping appearance by a guest ever. Hell, Nicole even caught Conan gawking at her beyond sexy cleavage and called him out on it in front of millions! Can you blame him? I mean, said cleavage is the definition of “Awesome!” if you ask me. And anyone who isn’t blind.
Same as the Duffster, Jessica Alba’s hotness hit the roof once she started to show her pregnancy, and I’m not just saying that because her already bodacious bosom ballooned to eyeball-melting hotness levels… ok, that is the main reason, but she also started showing off said super bosom, and that’s not like her at all. I’m guessing it’s because of the hormonal changes and stuff like that? Well, whatever the case may be, she showed off the goods like it was nobody’s business, and I totally respect that. And her super bosom.
Amber Heard may not have been photographed as much as the rest of the babes on the list, or attended as many events, but the few times that we did see her, especially at a shindig, she totally induced drooling… with her wicked sexiness, and her ridiculously sexy body! Good lord… this girl’s body is a rollercoaster of hotness, and she oozes sex appeal like no one else. And she totally digs chicks, so that definitely merits the number four spot on the list… hot damn does it ever!
It’s a tie! C’mon, you knew that my future wife Candice Swanepoel was going to be on the list, and you also knew that the Megan Fox (aka “the sexiest celebrity babe on the entire planet”) was making the list as well, right? I mean, Candice is my future wife and all, and I posted more photos of Candice than any other celebrity babe this past year. And Megan is “uber sexy” personified, and every single appearance she made was a scorcher. And I seriously don’t think that one unleashed more sexiness than the other this past year, so I decided to let these two babes share the number three spot. Or maybe it’s just that I like seeing both my girls together…
Kate Upton is hands down THE supermodel of the year, and it’s all thanks to uber adorable hotness, her ginormous cleavage, and the rest of her ridiculously sexy curves and lovely lady lumps. And her dancing skills. And her tweets. And especially her booty in lingerie and in tiny bikini bottoms. And her bikini-busting staring contests. And her struts on the catwalk that can make a nun drool like a brain-dead zombie. And her… hell, I can go on and on, but I have a feeling that you guys have already stopped reading this and clicked on the screaming hot cow-milking photo above, eh? Hello?
And the number one celebrity babe of 2011 is none other than Selena Gomez! Selena went from being an adorably cute girl to one sexy little minx in 2011… and by “sexy little minx” I totally mean that she showed off her surprisingly plentiful bosom like there was no tomorrow. And she unleashed a serious dose of her killer stems on a regular basis as well. And seriously, there wasn’t one photo or appearance where she didn’t look sexy and drool-inducing. Yes, even in the photos of her and her doorknob of a boyfriend Justin Bieber. And that’s saying something. Anyways, this girl is screaming hot beyond belief, and her body rocks like AC/DC, and she got sexier and sexier with ever passing month in 2011, so she gets top honors without any hesitation whatsoever.
That’s it for 2011 my peeps! I hope you enjoyed the list. Please leave your comments below and let me know who you think rocked 2011, and how wrong and crazy I am once again. And seriously, thanks for reading. Here’s to an even more shwingtastic 2012, woohoo!